Q & A with Lyndsay Wilson, LPC-MHSP

Q & A with Lyndsay Wilson, LPC-MHSP

We sat down with our newest team member, therapist Lyndsay Wilson, LPC-MHSP, to learn more about how she landed in Nashville, what surprises her most about therapy, and what she thinks everyone should know about attachment styles. We hope you enjoy reading it.

Welcome, Lyndsay! 

Thanks so much! I’m thrilled to be here. 

We’re thrilled to have you. First question: What Attracted You To Nashville?

We moved here from Atlanta right before 2020 when the tornado happened, followed by the pandemic. People stepped up to help each other. I love the welcoming spirit and hospitality of the people in Nashville. Even in the tumultuous climate that we are in, people are genuinely kind. Living in Nashville seems like the perfect balance of being in a big city with the feel of a small town…and there’s so much to do. There are so many new things popping up all the time. 

What do you like most about being a therapist?

I love being able to walk alongside my clients and experience their stories and cheer them on. It’s such a sacred process. My goal is to watch people heal, grow and thrive, settling into who they are uniquely designed to be. Experiencing that is the greatest thing. I deeply care for my clients so when they have breakthrough moments, it’s very exciting and it gets me very pumped up. 

Was there a defining moment when you knew you wanted to help people in this way?

Ever since I was in high school, I’ve felt drawn to counseling, but I didn’t start out working in mental health. In my previous career, I worked in non profits, leading teams. I enjoyed the opportunity to lead and help foster culture within teams because it required getting to know people. But, I felt like it was just scratching the surface. I think really understanding people’s experiences informs how they show up in teams, so I was always interested in each team member’s story. Becoming a therapist has given me the gift of being able to go deeper in a one-on-one setting. Guiding clients on their therapeutic journey gives me life. 

What do you like most about individual therapy? 

First and foremost, I love that each client is 100% the focus. It takes a lot of courage to enter the therapy room. It’s a great space to really examine our inner worlds, our relationships, and our patterns. I love noticing past patterns or parts of ourselves that we realize no longer serve us. I also ove for clients to see how much choice they have in their lives. They are the drivers of the process and they deserve all the credit for their personal growth and healing. It’s an honor to witness their moments of clarity, which lead to healing and wholeness. 

What surprises you most about the therapy process? 

I’m person-centered which means that I believe that each client is the expert of their own life. I don’t run ahead of them, I run alongside them. Clients surprise me in their ability to heal and grow themselves. I put myself in my rightful place in the therapy room, which is serving as a witness and a supportive guide, but ultimately trusting clients to drive the process.   

You enjoy working with couples. What’s your favorite part about being a couples therapist?

I love when partners are actually able to turn towards each other and feel seen, known, and understood by their partner. Many of the issues experienced by couples are much deeper below the surface than they may realize. I love when partners can acknowledge that they both desire a sense of connection. From there, they can build or rebuild emotional intimacy and trust. When couples build a secure attachment, they can see, hear, understand, and know each other and feel known, which will create the conditions for working through just about anything. 

Do you recommend that couples are in individual therapy as well?

It depends on the situation, but I often do recommend it. Not only will individual therapy support increased self-awareness, but it also demonstrates a commitment to the couples therapy process because you are also working on yourself. 

Why is trauma-informed care important to you? 

I think it’s important to understand past experiences and how they impact us now. I seek to understand, respect, and incorporate the impact of trauma in the therapy room. This does not mean that everything is about trauma. However, when a client has experienced something traumatic, it’s essential to understand how it can impact the whole self, the mind, the body, and relationships. This is very different from someone saying, “ah, that happened to you,” and moving forward without any acknowledgment of its impact. Trauma disorganizes the self.

Describe your ideal client.

I love this question. I enjoy working with all different kinds of clients, but if I had to describe an ideal client, it would be someone who brings curiosity to the experience. I also love working with people who are authentically themselves. Even if they walk in not knowing how to be authentically themselves, it’s someone who is willing to discover that. While it is never expected, I always appreciate a sense of humor. Sometimes we can laugh about hard things. Sometimes life doesn’t always have to be that serious. Having a sense of humor can be therapeutic. 

What is your theoretical orientation with couples? 

I like to take an eclectic approach with couples. I pull from elements of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), which is rooted in attachment work. We work on getting to the depth and understanding of a negative communication cycle – and then focus on building safety and emotional intimacy in the relationship. 

What do you want people to know about attachment styles? 

Attachment styles are a popular topic these days. What I really want people to know is that attachment styles aren’t fixed. They are not a permanent thing. When we are better able to understand our attachment styles formed in early relationships growing up, we can recognize patterns in our relationships. However, we have the ability to change how we show up in relationships.  

Can you share a little more about your interest in grief work? 

Grief work found me, in a way. I found that grief can be so isolating for the person who experiences it. It can be hard for others to understand what we are going through when we are grieving. As a therapist, being able to sit with that and say, “I see you,” is really important. I’m not going to tell you how to feel or how to get over it. I believe that helping people feel seen in their grief is sacred work and it’s amazing how healing it can be for a client. 

Culture often tells us to get over grief quickly. Bereavement leave is often 3 days long and the expectation can feel like, “you lost someone, get over it quickly.” Or people will feel uncomfortable when it’s been 3 or 4 months and they are still feeling sad. There’s shame in experiencing it and it can feel unsafe to express it. If they don’t get over it quickly, the client can feel like they are doing something wrong. The truth is: grief doesn’t go away, it just changes. The weight of the grief reflects the depth of the love that we have for that person. Grief is something we all experience, even if we haven’t lost a loved one. Maybe you are grieving this job change, or this break up. I like being able to challenge cultural expectations and helping my clients move through grief rather than move on from it. 

Do you have any advice for someone who is thinking about starting therapy but isn’t sure if they are ready?

I want to acknowledge that it takes courage to start therapy because it requires us to be vulnerable. This can be challenging in a new relationship, such as the therapist-client relationship, because vulnerability requires safety and trust. The expectation should not be that you just dump your guts in front of the therapist. You are allowed to take your time. It’s important to remember that, as the client, you are the driving force in this process. Given that, I would encourage someone who is thinking about it to do their research and advocate for themselves. I’m a firm believer of this – and research shows – that the therapeutic relationship is the central force in this process. This is why finding the best fit for each person matters.  

Finally, what do you do for fun?

I love to travel. I am a coffee enthusiast. I love going to local coffee shops and specifically trying black coffee. I like to taste the notes in the coffee (Central American coffee is my jam!). As you can tell, I’m very serious about it. I also like going to Nashville Sounds games and Nashville Soccer Club matches with my family and friends. I love being outside and active, whether it be sitting on my back deck, going for a run, or hiking at a nearby state park. I’d sit in the sun for hours, if I could!